Chapter 85 - Fear
After a long while, I mumbled, “I went… to Ms. Parker since you told me to… I was fine at Tiffany & Co., and I was fine on the way to Ms. Parker’s mansion… Then I was shown to the reception room… And there I saw Mr. Miller…”
When I started talking about Grayson, I couldn’t continue. The fear I felt back then was reignited, and my body stiffened up once again. Keith patted my back comfortingly as if he was consoling a child. I bit my lip.
“So I assume you weren’t able to tell her,” he said.
I flinched in his arms, and that was answer enough. I squeezed my eyes shut and apologized squeakily, “I’m sorry…”
Keith replied nonchalantly, “It’ll take a while until you get completely better.”
At that moment, I felt what it was like for my heart to shrink. Was he disappointed in me? Did he think I was useless now?
I struggled to think. What was I supposed to do now? What should I do?
“Is your arm all right? We should go take out the stitches…” I asked, finally having remembered one thing that I could do for him.
However, the answer that came back was simply indifferent. “Charles will take care of that.”
I was at a loss for words. “I see…”
He must have thought that I was unreliable.
I felt like I was going to cry, so I closed my eyes. I bit my lip and let go before squeezing out, “I’m sorry… for making you come all the way down here.”
My throat was dry, and it interrupted my sentence. Still holding me in his arms, Keith stroked my back. For a moment, I could feel him burying his nose in my hair and deeply inhaling my scent—or perhaps he had simply sighed.
“It can’t be helped. After all, you can’t live without me,” he muttered.
I was in despair. I muttered another word of apology, but Keith didn’t say anything more. In his unmoving arms, I was left to clench my teeth and hold back my tears.
‘I’ll try the method that Steward mentioned to me,’ I told myself.
It was the only choice I had left. I had to get better somehow. I had hardened my resolve to store away my love for Keith, but I didn’t want to be deemed useless and thrown away. Until my last moment, I at least wanted to remain a competent secretary.
Even now, his scent was making my heart throb.
I closed my eyes and took a deep, shaky breath. Even until then, Keith continued to hold me. I didn’t know what he was thinking, but one thing was for sure.
He must have been disappointed in me for my incompetence.
The alarm echoed loudly across the room. I heard the sound, but my eyes refused to open. I groaned and turned over when the sound suddenly disappeared.
“Would you like to sleep a little more, Yeonwoo? If you don’t eat breakfast, you could take 15 more minutes.” An ice-cold voice woke me up from my sleep.
Charles had entered the room and turned off the alarm. My consciousness was alert, but I still couldn’t open my eyes.
I twitched a little and sighed. “I’ll get up. And breakfast… I’ll skip today.”
“Understood. Would you like a glass of juice?”
I hesitated a little before nodding. “Yes, thank you. Anything is fine.”
“Understood,” Charles repeated before leaving the room. After the sound of the door closing faded, the room was dead silent. I sighed deeply and pulled myself up.
“Hahh…” Another sigh escaped my mouth as I finally managed to sit up. Only after I rubbed my eyes a few times was I finally able to lift my eyelids—albeit halfway.
I was only able to completely open my eyes after taking a shower. A household employee always made sure to apply some kind of solution on one side of the mirror so that no condensation formed on it. Feeling a little strange, I stared at the surface of the mirror that always remained clean no matter how much hot water it was sprayed with. This clarity contrasted with the cloudy surface of the other half of the mirror.
My face in the reflection seemed more exhausted than ever. It wasn’t surprising as I had slept poorly last night on top of crying before falling asleep. My hand trembled faintly as I swept back my wet hair.
Yesterday’s memories were missing in places. In any case, one thing for sure was that I couldn’t go back to work afterward. I tried to return to the office, but Keith interrupted by simply saying, “You’ll be a bother.”
His words had completely broken whatever little motivation I had left in me. Left with no other choice, I tried to call Emma, but even that was stopped by Keith who ordered Whitaker to relay my words to her instead. In the end, I returned to the mansion and holed myself up in my room, unable to lift my head out of self-hatred.
After the night went by, I was finally able to regain some sense. I shook my head hard and stared directly at myself in the mirror.
I hated sitting on my bottom and empty-mindedly blaming myself. I had to turn this situation around somehow.
“Whew,” I breathed in loudly and glared at myself.
‘Don’t ever do something so stupid ever again,’ I told myself.
When I went down to the front door on time, Keith was already in the car. I greeted Whitaker and Charles one after another and got in the car.
“Good morning,” I greeted him formally like usual. Keith glanced at me. I had examined my appearance multiple times over before coming downstairs. He would not be able to find any flaw. I reported stiffly, “I’m sorry about yesterday’s incident. I will visit Ms. Parker once again soon and let her know the news.”
The driver sat down and started the car.